I’ve managed to hold down a part time gig for 5 whole months! So, koodos to ‘myself’ for that. However, there have been mountains, hills, and tree stumps to jump over. There has been struggle and growth…spiritual growth that is. My view on the World is changing day by day.
When I started it wasn’t too bad. I am just now starting to get a bit annoyed with certain people, but it’s probably not them…..it’s really me. I can get aggravated by certain personalities and characteristics. Sometimes I find myself actively engaging in kind of a transference. Placing emotions that I have for someone upon another person due to their role or characteristics at that time. Initially I kept to myself at work and still pretty much do. Although, everyone else is super friendly and chatty with each other. Every weekend they are asking each other what are you doing this weekend? I soon realized it’s just a polite things certain people do. I never ask anyone at any jobs ever what they were doing on a weekend cause I didn’t give a f***. Look … just know I’m happy I won’t be working! That’s it that’s all.
I started to adapt to the climate. This is an environment where everyone is pretty helpful and respectful of each other for the most part. I attempted to engage in some conversation when they would randomly talk within the clinic. It’s a pretty small place….very small. You’d have to whisper dead in someone’s ear not to be heard type small. So….I kinda had to try to blend in a little more. I could tell people would wonder why I wouldn’t give details about my weekend or why I was so private. I am trying to not care about these minuscule things because in the grand scheme of life and reality that s*** doesn’t matter. No one can feel some kind of way about a person that doesn’t know you or have any real relationship with you keeping their life private.