Teenage Reflections

As of late, reflect so much on what I was like 10 years ago. 10 years ago I was 18….and knew nothing about the World or how it all worked. Now, as I reflect I see how much I’ve grown. It’s not at the pace or speed I would necessarily like…but it’s my path. It’s a strange thing for me to look back at my former self. My younger self did many silly things. My adult self still does many silly things, but it’s on another ( more mature) level.

I observe my sister, who’s 5 years younger than me. I see the mistakes she’s making and doesn’t realize it. She’s the type that has to see on her own. The changes only a few years make in our decision making process is incredible. Being close to that 30 year  mark can shake you a lil bit. It’s time to be in full adult mode. I’m gearing up for full adult mode. For me, one of the main things is really putting in the effort to change my thought processes and state of mind to a positive frequency.

I think back on the silly and dangerous situations I put myself in as a naive teenager/young adult thinking ” nothing will happen to me”. Oh silly me, but oh how I was watched over some how. Then again things were not as bad as they are now. When I was getting out of h.s. the area was starting to get worse.

I remember trying so hard to fit and blend in with others. Not knowing how I really was or how I was supposed to act, dress, or even speak. I still struggle with these things at times. However, I realize I am unique in my own way. I no longer try super hard to dress like anyone else or be into the things others are.

The friends/ acquaintances I had back then I don’t really have much in common with anymore. The few that there were have children now, think on a different level than I, or are only concerned with surface level bs. Some of them just are super busy or may not live in the same state as me anymore.

Lately I’ve had a couple acquaintances hit me up to hangout. It’s a little difficult to reunite with people you were tight with before college now. I mean it’s been years and though it has been some contact …I just feel like we are very different. However, I could be wrong. Maybe I won’t feel the same after a conversation with her. Life takes us through many changes and stages of metamorphosis. I’ve grown with this person I’ve become and will continue to do so.

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