* Warning* *Tirade* * Explicit content used*
I am by no means fond of physicians, hospitals, psychiatrist etc. I have not always been like that. Doctor’s visits seemed fun and exciting as a child. As an adult I believe many of them are full of it or don’t know what they are talking about. Just because a doctor says, I’m not the one to believe immediately.
Majority of my life I have always had insurance through my parents or my own jobs. Well, right now that is not the case! I have some medical card or whatever. I’ve witnessed people get decent assistance with this. I use to even think when I was working….I shouldn’t even pay for insurance.
Lately I have been experiencing heightened anxiety, probably due to a few changes recently. I decided to make an appointment because I am or was considering medication. I wanted something I did not have to take each and everyday . Maybe something like a benzodiazepine that I could possibly take as needed. At this particular facility I was told I’d have to see a general physician to be refereed to a psychiatrist. Cool with me ….I understand there are processes. Even though I hadn’t gone through this with my insurance in the past. *sidenote -I requested a Black female doctor* *rolls my fucking eyes so hard* I thought I’d feel more comfortable and all of that type of stuff. I had to be like her first patient. It was 8:20am. She seemed very uninterested. Asked some questions about my anxiety. Blah blah. Basically she ended up giving me a referral to the behavioral health clinic within their facility. She also wants to send me to a lab for blood work. As I am asking this lady about the blood work she answers my questions very vaguely. I have to prod for info. I am not fond of getting blood drawn…cause half the time they just do it to do it, I feel. She gives me the paperwork and such and I attempt to make an appointment. As I am doing so with the registration person she says that basically they only have counseling here. I explain to her that was one of my two reasons for the visit. She goes back to speak with the doctor. This _______ , lots of words I could fill in that blank with. She tells her that there has to be an outside referral. I’m thinking like….ok how do I get that. Shouldn’t she have given that to me??!
I am aggravated by this time. My patience is shot and I feel slighted!!!! Like don’t play with me or my intelligence. So, I basically leave the facility cause I’m like fuck it. Then I go back in….a lil teary eyed cause I’m pissed and rageful. I have to be careful when I am like this. There have been occasions where I ended up in handcuffs/jail for acting on emotions. As I walk back to the desk I take a deep breath and politely tell the same young lady that I need to get a referral, that is why I came here. She took me to some social workers office. Anywho, I got the damn referral! Did it really take all that!!??? Why the ________ just couldn’t give it to me? I have a history of mental illness and the clinic is associated with a hospital I use to go to. I know they could’ve gotten a hold to some records if that was questionable and she just thought I wanted meds. IDK what the _______ problem was. The social worker even asked if the doctor gave me pushback….I was taken aback for a second. Like wait, this lady did do that…but I tried to word it better. ( being passive) I shouldn’t have though. But I think the social worker knows still.
I also had another issue I went in for and the ________ just glossed over that too. I’m like I could’ve stayed home and finished my crochet projects. *shrugs shoulders* I
just felt still feel angry about this situation. Like how do you treat people coming in for medical care like that?! Trifling as ever!! But I am happy I did not explode while I was there. I now have experienced what I’ve heard here and there about how people are treated without insurance. Well, anyways I plan to work part time somewhere soon once I feel a little better. I will NOT have people treating me like shit because I don’t have insurance. Or I just won’t go to doctor because it could turn ugly next time and I am in no position to act a fool and get in any situations. I just want to be at peace. Why can’t folks act right and cooperate…do their jobs, act human and such.