6am Thoughts….

It’s about 6am , dark, quiet, and a strange peace before I get up and prepare for the day. It’s always very peaceful those moments before the sunrises to me. All I hear is the buses and cars going past outside my home. There are still not many on my street until maybe  7 or 8am, so it’s still pretty quiet.

I’ve been spending my time crocheting, reading, and watching some films/documentaries that help my mind.Things have been calm for me with a few rough spots, but nothing I can’t get past.  I’ve been working on a number of custom orders for a few people. I tend to get really nervous about this! I’m always thinking…oh what if this or that, what if it doesn’t fit, what if the sky falls? However, most of the time the pieces come together just fine. However, I am working on my tension/gauge and measuring it so that my pieces come out right each time.

I’ve also been watching and  number of lectures by Dr. Phil Valentine about higher consciousness and other stuff. I know he’s been around a very long time, but recently I actually decided to check out what he’s all about. I grew up Baptist, but as a young adult I embarked on a spiritual journey as a Hebrew Israelite. Of course those around me (family) were not fond of these changes. Most respected it, my mom did and I am glad she did not attempt to hinder my growth. As of right now I am not certain that I can some up my spirituality ONLY as a Hebrew Israelite. I have gained more knowledge and have some different feelings than I did 5 years ago.

Since these various feelings have be present I feel like others will judge me for “flip floppin” lol, but I have not dwell into that. I have to do what is good for me. I believe I stayed stagnant for a while spiritually worried about how others would perceive me. People can judge and run their mouths, but at least I took a leap and explored other belief systems. If you stay in the same space and don’t explore how will you know what’s right for you.Well….I’m going to find out. This was a bit all over, but you catch my drift!


7 Comments Add yours

  1. Tareau Barron says:

    Thank you for sharing not only your path for spiritual oneness and peace but the trials and tribulations your family gives you for doing so. I am not Christian and I believe in a higher power, but I also believe that everyone is entitled to their own way to peace. I’ve been studying the Yoruba tribes culture/religion for a short time, and a lot of our own people (black) who were raised Christian are extremely judgemental about any changes in religion. It’s common in any religion once you change or convert. I just hate the constant questions or the “encroachment” of certain spiritual journeys that a lot of people give you. About your anxiety and anxiousness, no one can tell you how to feel or what to do. If I could give advice I would say just go through the emotions like you’ve been doing. Maybe it will pass maybe not but TRY to remember all of us HUMANS are wired differently. Peace sista

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Thanks for reading Tareau. Indeed our people can definitely be extremely judgement on religious changes. It’s surprising too because many don’t read the Bible nor attempt to live a “righteous”life. 😒 but can judge others harshly. I don’t like the questions either. I feel that in some situations it can just lead to ill-feelings. Just let the person go through it. I got asked so many questions. It’s ironic you’ve been studying the Yoruba tribes. I too am interested in learning a bit more about that. I’ve come across a number of things lately that sparked my interest on it.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Tareau Barron says:

        It’s tricky trying to learn a new religion or new spiritual identity when most of the world is the Christian faith. What’s work for me is honestly disassociating myself with the world to focus on my spirituality. That’s a euphemism for what I really want to say but I just wish a lot of people who follow Christianity had that same mindset. I believe no religion is better than other. It to me feels like a money grab mostly. But me saying that will offend a lot of people. I would hope you do YOU meaning you find what you love spiritual and enjoy it.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I agree! It’s like a pimp game the way I see it sometimes. When I first changed beliefs I was open to talking with people. But that was my younger self. I know better now. Everyone doesn’t need to know what I believe and all that. It’s personal. So yea I definitely do ME. Many people put one religion over the other. I can’t say a Hebrew Israelite is better at this point in life.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Tareau Barron says:

        Preach sister the way I see it is we all die. If u believe in a higher power great if not great too. I don’t judge nor do I care. If I saw an attractive woman and she tells me she’s agnostic or Christian or Jewish she would get it no matter what hahahahahahha. Equal opportunity. Hahahhahaha. Sorry the beast in me came out but it’s true. I don’t care about other folks bit I do have a healthy respect and an eagerness as well.


      4. Lolol!!!! I feel you on that

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Not that I categorize that as my belief systems any longer

        Liked by 1 person

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